I wish upon a tree...
that all my wishes will come true.
And that all my shattered dreams,
will be fixed into a whole.
From the first time we met till now, after 2 years and 11 months, yesterday's lunch at Forum's Mcdonald's was the first time we ate together. Just the two of us.
It was pretty exhilrating.
And TOTALLY UNEXPECTED.
Did ask him out for lunch when the both of us are working (when his staff are not working), but some how, it was either he had eaten or he wasn't hungry yet or he didn't want to.
So yesterday's lunch with him, came as a total suprise. In fact, it happened so fast that I didn't even had time to be shocked.
Went down to his office to pass him some documents and to put Rachel's unbroken Time Out on her desk. Then as usual, we played around a little. Meaning one of us started teasing the other (98% of the time, it was him who initiated it). I was pretty hungry at that time as it was almost 1pm, thus I asked him to treat me to lunch. I said that in chinese - 请我吃饭！ Having a slight craving for Mcdonald's, I mentioned that the weekday lunch offer has been extended to weekends too, which is great as eating Mcdonald's nowadays is so expensive. He said okie, he will treat me to 1 grain of rice...as I had said 饭, instead of saying 请我吃午餐. He played with my words and said he will treat me 一粒饭 (1 grain of rice).
Expecting this kind of comeback from me, I responded, "NOooooooooooooo..I meant lunch!" to which he said it was too late to change my words, he will treat me to one grain of rice. I made sniffling sounds and pretended to be sad and pitiful and cried out I was very hungry and for him to treat me lunch. (Of course he wasn't fooled by my act. We both knew that I was fake crying.) We played around like that for awhile until I felt and heard the slight rumble that my stomach was making. I decided to make a fast exit, though I loathe to leave him so soon; but I didn't want history to repeat itself. The last time I decided to stick around for awhile more, my tummy made its protest known LOUDLY. In his presence. He never let me forget that incident that day.
As I told him I want to go off and eat lunch, he stood up, got out his wallet and handed me a $10 note. Before that $10-note, he played around a little, giving me coins (four 5-cents) and a $2-note to which I said wasn't enough. I spied a $50-note and told him that I want that note. But he insisted on giving me the coins / $2-note.
In the end, when he handed me the $10-note, I was caught off guard and decided to drop the game, to tell him that I was only joking about asking him to treat me. Before that, I decided to play again; so I chided him, saying that just giving me money for lunch is a lack of sincerity. He should be the one buying our meals while I sit down and wait for him to bring the food. He reacted to my statement with his usual flair and told me I would go and buy while he waits. At that sentence, my brain came to an abrupt stop. As I was trying to mull over his sentence, he had already shrugged off his jacket and made to leave the room.
Wow.
My gosh.
It came surprisingly sudden that I had absolutely no time to go into inner-hyper-happy mode.
You have to understand, after knowing this guy for almost 3 years and only having his company hp number, while his staff have his personal number, is the biggest sting and the ultra reminder to wake up whenever I got too caught up in interactions with him.
Anyway, the walk to Forum's Mcdonald's was peppered with some chit chat and nonsense talk. I brought our lunches, using his $10-note. He got the Fillet 'O Fish meal with I ordered the Double Cheeseburger meal and changed the Coke to Green Tea. When I put down the tray, I took out my green tea with the intention of removing it from the spot in front of him so that I could shift his cup of coke (which was in front of me) to him. But as I got my drink, he moved his drink too. Haiz. Did that give the impression that I am selfish? That I only look after myself? I then moved to take his fillet for him, but he was a step faster. Sobbz....
At some point, I returned him the change. It was 70 cents. He remarked that it was so little. Immediately I thought that he meant the change was so little. It was only when everything was over and I was mulling over the happenings duriing lunch that it hit me that he was saying in a sarcastic way that the coins are so little...he had meant that there are so many coins. (He doesn't likes to keep coins). AARGHHHHHHHH. I am so slow and stupid! If it was Rachel, she would have caught on immediately!
I guess it is impossible huh? We have no chemistry at all.
Lunch consisted of him playing with his Iphone most of the time while we were eating. We did talk a little and all that, it wasn't uncomfortable. Just that, if it was anyone else, if it was with Joling / Rachel, things wouldn't be like that. We really just don't have much to talk about. I have so much to ask him but I do not know how to ask and what to ask. What little conversaton we had, was mostly me asking him questions and him answering.
An awful thought occured to me..Rachel wasn't at work that day though she was supposed to. Maybe he was mad and bothered and so, took me up on going for lunch together? Because he is alone and a tad frustrated with her?
I am a really lousy person huh? Thinking that kind of thing about a friend.
Sigh.
I think we communicate better in written words than in speech.
It might have been no big deal and nothing special. But I will never forget that day's lunch.
10 April 2010.
11:50:00 PM
you drove my darkness away//*
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Musings and rantings of a girl who enjoys the simple things in life and wishes that the world is not so complicated.
Night Dancers
by Thomas Kennedy
Their quick feet pattered on the grass
As light as dewdrops fall.
I saw their shadows on the glass
And heard their voices call.
But when I went out hurrying
To join them,they were gone.
I only found a little ring
Of footprints on the lawn.
